Symptom Recital
by Ithlien
Summary: Shannon Rutherford's first few days on 'Craphole Island'
1. State of Mind

**Symptom Recital**

Disclaimer: Lost and it's characters belong to J.J Abrams and ABC

Summary: A look at the women everyone loves to hate.

Author's Note: Inspired by Dorothy Parker's poem Symptom Recital, a poet whose wit and wisdom reminds me of Shannon. Some scenes are slightly reworked to fit with this fiction.

* * *

I do not like my state of mind;

I'm bitter, querulous, unkind.

- Symptom Recital-

* * *

Shannon gripped the sides of her seat to maintain her balance, her lacquered pink nails chipping slightly on the plastic arm hold. She sighed, irritated, as her elbow bumped into the stomach of a sweaty man beside her. She scowled and pulled back her elbow as the man nodded at her before belching loudly.

Shannon averted her eyes, willing the man not to speak to her. The last thing she wanted was small talk. She shouldn't have been here; she didn't belong in the business class. She was First class. She revolved her entire life around being First class.

Closing her eyes, Shannon inhaled sharply. She hated closed-in spaces, especially when that space was obstructed by sweaty men.

The man belched again, nauseated by the smell, Shannon turned, ready to snap. But before she could say a word, the plane gave a slight lurch. Shannon's stomach dropped and immediately her breathing began to constrict.

A horrible screeching sound followed, like fingernails on a chalkboard, before the real turbulence happened. Her neck jerked forward as the blast of turbulence hit the plane. She gripped her purse tightly, clenching her teeth, the last thing she needed now was to draw attention to herself with an asthma attack.

Shannon shuddered, as a short man rushed past their seats in a state of panic, closely followed by several more stewards. A stewardess stood at the front of their section telling everyone to remain calm. Though her damn perky voice was meant to put the passengers at ease, Shannon could see the uneasy restlessness in the other passengers as the plane continued to jump in mid-air.

Brutal honest truth. That's one of the many things Shannon believed in. The fear in the stewardess' eyes was apparent; the way she glanced about the plane positively screamed that something was wrong.

Boone looked up from the in-flight magazine he leafed through. "The seat belt light is flashing." He said coldly, before returning to his magazine. Despite Boone's front, Shannon doubted he was actually reading the airline trash. Boone had mastered speed reading in the sixth grade, but for some reason his eyes remained focused on the same page for over an hour.

"Obviously." Shannon rolled her eyes, but purposely dropped her purse so she could bend over and do up her seatbelt discreetly. The last thing she needed was for Boone to lord another thing over her.

"Do you need your inhaler?" Boone rested the magazine on his lap as the plane jerked again, he looked at her worriedly, but Shannon swore she saw a smirk hidden in his eyes.

"No." Shannon gritted her teeth and looked away. _Not now, don't panic, not now._ She breathed in deeply and forced herself to relax.

"This happens all the-" Boone's reassurance was cut short was a horrible grinding sound of metal on metal. Shannon's neck was jerked forward again. Before she could yell _lawsuit_ the air bags dropped in front of their seats.

The plane began to shake as if a giant unseen hand was playing toss. Shannon stared at the yellow plastic air bag in front of her, forgetting completely what to do.

"Shannon!" Boone shrieked, the yellow mask already on, obscuring half his face, making his eyes stand out more than usual. Boone reached over her shoulder and grabbed her airbag and roughly put it on her, all but tangling the damn thing in her hair. She would have been angry if she weren't so frightened.

Shannon forced herself to take long breaths, but her legs and hands shook with fear and already her chest was constricting. Air was rushing through the plane and people were screaming, adrenaline was pumping through her body but being strapped to the seat prevented her from acting upon the increased energy.

Boone suddenly reached over and grabbed her hand, squeezing it tightly as the tail section of the plane ripped away. Her hand felt as though it was being crushed by the steel force of his grip but at the moment it was the most comforting thing in the world.

Tears filled her eyes as she watched helplessly was people were tossed from the plane, still locked into their seats. _Seatbelts won't help them now_, Shannon thought, sickened by sight. She glanced over at Boone, suddenly desperate to hear one last stupid joke or berating comment. But all he did was look at her, gripping her hand even more tightly.

His eyes said far more in that one moment than they probably ever should.

Those eyes were the last thing she remembered before feeling the sickening plunge of the plane, before a thick cloying blackness took over every sense she had.

* * *

This was horrible. That was her first thought. The putrid smell of burnt hair and rubber mingled in the air with the occasional unsettling waft of burnt flesh. She remembered hearing screaming, long horrible drawn out screams of a terrified woman; it wasn't until Boone clamped his hand over he mouth that she realized it had been her.

Boone pulled her away from the burning wreckage. Dimly, as he led her away, she wondered how it was possible she was still alive.

Her heels dug into the loose sand, feeling oddly empty Shannon bent down and wiped a speck of blood from her white Gucci leather shoes, only managing to wipe the redness into the shoe.

This was too much. The smell, the scenery, the horrible clanging noises of the plane wreckage as the metal bent and tore. Shannon stood detached as people raced around her, astonished how far Boone had led her away from the burning wreckage.

Shannon was surprised at how calm she felt after giving into to the fear that had been coiled in her stomach. After she had screamed herself hoarse, crying and swearing about how this wasn't supposed to happen, all Shannon felt was a sense of displacement.

Though close to the ground zero of the crash, all Shannon could do was tap her foot and watch as other people scurried back and forth. Boone had left her almost immediately, spotting a women lying still on the beach. Although Shannon had stated that the woman was probably already dead, Boone still ran off to help. He always had to be the hero.

The moment the buzzing of the engine changed to a dull grind, Shannon knew something was wrong. Instinctively she shielded her head and turned away, just as an explosion ripped through the air. With an obnoxiously loud bang, the engine blew apart, sending shattered metal into the air. The smoke was horrible. She waved her hands in an attempted to clear some of the smoke but the only thing her efforts accomplished was sending waft of smoke up her nose.

Coughing fiercely at the smell of gas, Shannon stumbled away from her position, pushing her way past several people. Stumbling over a piece of metal, Shannon tripped to the ground reaching into her purse she clutched at her inhaler. The feel of the plastic tube calmed her immediately.

Head clear, Shannon moved the piece of metal and settled herself onto the beach. The wing of the plane was tittering precociously and people were still screaming and pleading for help. Placing her shawl underneath her, Shannon sat and waited for help to arrive.

She thought she heard Boone calling for her, but she made no effort to respond. He knew she was safe, and he could find her whenever. The last thing she needed was some sort of post- end of day's confession.

Catching sight of her, Boone scrambled over to her, all but collapsing into the ground. Immediately he reached behind her and grabbed her Prada purse.

"What the hell do think you're doing?" Shannon yelped as Boone pawed through the contents, before emptying it on the ground. She winced as her make-up and perfume hit the sand of the beach.

"Getting pens." Boone said shortly, rifling through the sand. He grinned as he found two of her pens.

" What? You better put everything back!" Shannon screeched, diving to seize a lipstick that was rolling away. "What do you need my pens for?"

"Do you think the ink will matter?" Boone pondered for a moment as he stood up. Shannon looked up at her brother and was certain that he had finally cracked.

"Boone!"

"You wouldn't understand." Boone retorted before he turned back to her, his face smug. "I'm helping the doctor."

"What doctor?" Shannon yelled as Boone scurried away, presumably to either help or hinder. Shannon guessed hinder.

* * *

Boone didn't return immediately, like she guessed he would. He stayed in the center of the commotion, trying to fit into whatever group was forming. Shannon didn't see the point in trying to make ties with these people, especially because in a few hours a rescue operation would land and she would never have to be here again.

She smiled at the thought, and all but laughed out loud when she thought of the interest that USA Today would have in the story of the plane crash and the miraculous survivors. Shannon stretched out into the sand content with her daydream.

Shannon had already tried to use her cell phone and was surprised when the damn thing wouldn't even turn on. Though there was no hint of a scratch on the cell, the damn black screen stared back at her despite whatever buttons she pushed. Shannon tossed the broken cell phone away, catching sight of a young pregnant girl standing in the shallows of the ocean. The girl caught her glance, smiled and waved, seeing no point in being rude Shannon smiled back.

The fires that the others had started were providing an unusual heavy warmth to the already hot tropical weather, the heat tickled the back of her throat and chest, making her breathing labored and heavy. Normally Shannon would have been pissed, but at the moment those fires were central to getting them out of here. So she just smiled and imagined an air conditioned room and a movie deal, just for her.

But the daylight had dimmed unusually quickly for Shannon's taste. Especially since she hadn't hear any sound of a rescue plane. Shannon was still quite pleased with the location she had chosen, it was close enough to the fire so that she could bask in its glow, and far enough from heat and the crowd that had gathered around the fire that she wouldn't have to make conversation.

Yes, she was quite pleased with herself. So much so she decided to treat herself to a pedicure. Shannon concentrated on painting her toenails, seeing no point to get all grimy and dirty just because she was temporarily stuck on an island. After all, when the planes arrived, they would hardly be given a chance to clean up before the press arrived.

**  
**Most of the time Boone was not a silent walker, he had an odd ability to make more noise on pavement that Shannon's stilettos. But other times, he had an ability to sneak up behind her; this was not one of those times. Shannon heard Boone's heavy footsteps ages ago, she simply had no inclination to greet him.

Boone sat beside, watched her toes for a moment before holding out a silver package. Tearing her attention from her feet to Boone, Shannon wrinkled her nose immediately. The smell of the package hit her before the title did. "As if I'm going to start eating chocolate" Shannon sniffed, turning her head back to her feet.

"Shannon, we may be here for a while." Boone said quietly, a note of pity creeping into his voice. She hated that tone, the one where it seemed that Boone understood something she never wanted to. He had used that tone even when he was ten, when she had told him not to get too comfortable – she was so certain that her mother would come back.

Shannon rolled her eyes. "The plane had a black box, idiot," she said plainly. "They know exactly where we are; they're coming. I'll eat on the rescue boat."

Boone held the chocolate out to her again, adamant that she would take it. "I'll eat on the rescue boat!" Shannon insisted again, the last thing she needed was someone to cast a shadow on her hope of rescue.

Boone shrugged, opting to eat the chocolate himself. Shannon caught his gaze and smiled, finally feeling a sense of ease overtake her. Perhaps their past could be forgotten, left behind in the burning wreckage of the plane.

Shannon turned back to her pedicure, easily imagining herself on a beach in Los Angeles. Before she could comment on the peacefulness, a rough noise sounded behind them. The sound seemed to originate from inside and around the island; all at once it seemed everywhere and nowhere. With bated breath, Shannon listened to the sound, the noise sounding oddly like a construction zone, the sound of metal crushing and bending.

Shannon and Boone stared at the jungle, trying to see what caused the noise. Shannon half expected to see a dinosaur rise over the treetops. Sounds still rumbling and roaring, Shannon turned to Boone and asked cautiously, "What was that?"

Shannon and Boone stood, watching as the other survivors stood as well and moved closer to the forest. Catching snatches of their conversation, Boone stepped away from Shannon and walked over to the other survivors. "Boone!" Shannon protested, angered at her brother's action. Was Boone trying to get himself killed?

After a moment of uncertainty, Shannon joined the other survivors. Distinctly aware of how she didn't fit into the group. The doctor that Boone claimed to have helped was also in the group, alongside a woman around Shannon's age. Almost ten people, almost all of them strangers to her, stood together as the sound seemed to surround them again. Shannon drew in a frightened breath as she saw the tree of the jungle fall to the ground effortlessly.

"Terrific." A guy said sarcastically, he looked at the others and seemed to wait for answer.

"It was probably nothing." Boone said assuredly, shrugging off the uncertain looks sent his way.

The pregnant girl fiddled with a large wooden necklace around her neck, and left the group quietly. After a moment a few other's left as well.

"Well." The guy continued, watching the pregnant girl leave. "Before Jurassic Park strikes again, I think we should make a round of intros." He looked around the few, waiting for someone to agree with him. "I'm Charlie… Charlie Pace." He said easily, he looked at them almost expectantly.

"Walt." A young black kid said sullenly as he settled himself on the ground. An older man, who Shannon assumed was his father, sat next to him. "Michael." The older man answered, "Walt's father." He added with an awkward tone. Shannon felt a strange déjà vu come over her, as she observed the awkwardness of father and child.

Charlie sat down as well, tapping his fingers anxiously onto the ground. Shannon shifted from foot to foot as Boone joined the three on the ground and introduced them both. Shannon wasn't sure if she should join the group or not, she caught the gaze of a Middle Eastern man who smiled at her knowingly. The man offered her a place in the sand next to Boone, unable to refuse the unasked offer, Shannon settled cautiously into the ground followed after a moment by the man.

"Sayid." The man said quietly, his face was expressionless as he surveyed the group. As if sizing them up. Shannon averted her eyes the moment the man's gaze fixed onto her, Shannon didn't believe in mind reading, but if she did she would suspect him.

"So." Charlie said, his fingers still drumming into the sand. "The plane crashed." He said easily, looking over at the fuselage. "Wild."

"Who'd have thought?" Michael answered, casting a long look his son. His eyes seemed to grow sadder. "On top of everything."

"Yeah." Boone answered, suddenly looking at Shannon. His eyes seemed dark and angry, and Shannon could almost see the thoughts rolling around in his head. She tensed immediately, certain that he would sudden burst out what had happened to complete strangers. Boone looked away and picked at the sand. "Everything."

The group sat in silent, Shannon assumed that there was really nothing to say. After all, Shannon doubted there was some sort of manners that could be pertinent after a plane crash. Shannon caught the young boy's, Walt's, eye and he smiled at her as if this was nothing more than a picnic in the park. The innocence of the young.

"It is possible the sound was mechanical." Sayid, the man with the dark eyes, said suddenly. The silence of the group grew even more hushed. Though the entire point of the circle was to discuss the sound, Shannon doubted that it was a topic any of them wanted to dwell on. She just wanted to get home; she didn't give a damn about some monster in the jungle. Whatever it was it could wait until the rescue opp arrived.

"I work in construction." Michael answered after a moment of thought. "It wasn't _unlike_ a machine..." He trailed off; he shrugged and cast another unsure look at the jungle.

"But it wasn't like a machine either." Sayid concluded, offering a smile at the man.

Michael grinned for a moment, but his smiled faded and his brow furrowed. "Whatever it was, it wasn't natural." He said simply.

The group seemed to ponder Michael's comment; the whole group seemed so serious that Shannon fought the urge to laugh. Sayid and Michael were determined to solve the mystery of the sound; Boone's face was oddly contorted in deep thought. Only Charlie and Walt did not seemed focused on joining into the conversation.

Charlie shifted for a few moments before speaking. "Does anyone have any sun block?" Charlie asked, picking at his already slightly burned arm.

Shannon reached into her bag and dug out her lotion, brushing off a bit of sand leftover from Boone's search for pens. "Yeah, I do." She said as she passed it to Charlie. Shannon expected to feel a bit of remorse as Charlie pour a liberal amount of twenty dollar lotion onto his arm, but all she could do was grin.

A heavy-set man appeared; normally she'd have called him fat, but she was feeling charitable. He kneeled and sat by Charlie and Walt. Despite the appearance of joviality, the man seemed oddly anxious. "So. I was just looking inside the fuselage; it's pretty… grim in there. D'you think we should do something about the…" The man stumbled over his words as he caught sight of Walt, "b-o-d-y-s?" He finally spelled out.

Shannon fought the urge to laugh, as Michael looked at the man and said with disbelieving tone. "What are you spelling, man, 'bodies'?"

"B-o-d-i-e-s." The kid corrected easily, not missing a beat. Shannon was beginning to like this kid.

Ignoring Michael and Walt, Sayid turned to the man, "that sounds like a good idea." He said seriously, casting a look at the fuselage.

Shannon looked at Sayid shocked, he met her incredulous gaze. Shannon felt prickles rise up her back at his suggestion. "No!" She protested immediately, everybody seemed to be forgetting that they were going to be rescued. "They'll deal with it when they get here."

Before anyone could add their opinion on the matter, the doctor, Jack, joined their group. Standing outside the circle Jack seemed to pause making sure he received everyone's attention. "I'm gonna go out and look for the cockpit. See if we can find a transceiver to send out a distress signal to help the rescue team." Jack turned to Boone and continued. "You're gonna need to keep an eye on the wounded. If the guy in the suit wakes up, try to keep him calm, but don't let him remove that piece of shrapnel. Do you understand?"

Shannon nearly snorted as Boone's ears almost perked up at the thought of playing hero. He was nearly salivating. "Yeah. Got it. But what about the guy with the leg? The ti-"

"It stopped bleeding." Jack stated, cutting Boone off. "I took it off last night. He should be all right."

Boone nodded eagerly. "Yeah, cool. Good job." Shannon bit her tongue to keep from laughing, she wondering if Jack knew that Boone had failed his lifeguard's license three times, and only got the damned thing because his mother pulled a few strings. Not that Boone knew about the last part.

Charlie, the twitchy guy, stood up and started after Jack. "I'll come with. I wanna help."

Jack seemed unsure with the offer and waited a moment before answering. "I don't need any more help." Jack finally said, waiting for Charlie to bow out gracefully. But the guy seemed far too determined to let the topic fall.

"No, its cool, I don't really feel like standing still, so…" Charlie shifted expectantly and grinned when Jack nodded his consent. "Excellent."

Charlie sauntered off with Jack, but not before turning and waving them goodbye. Boone and Hurley immediately responded, but Shannon just watched. The moment Charlie left, there seemed to be no reason to stay in the small circle. Boone, in Wonder Boy mode, left almost immediately afterwards to check up on the Marshall.

Hurley nodded at them, before leaving as well.

"I wanna find Vincent." Walt suddenly said, turning to his father. The kid's tone was pleading and Shannon wondered who Vincent was.

"Yeah." Michael sighed, casting a tired look at the circle. He seemed to want to stay, Shannon thought, but he still got up and brushed the sand off. "We'll comb the beach line then."

Michael and Walt walked a few steps before Michael turned back. "Um. Vincent is a golden retriever, so if you see one…" Michael trailed off again.

"Of course." Sayid said easily, Michael smiled and left again.

Shannon bit her lip, trying to think of a way to leave the conversation gracefully. Though she wondered why she should care at all about hurt anyone's feelings. "So. Yeah." She muttered, standing easily. She shrugged at Sayid as he stood with her.

"Goodbye then." Sayid said calmly, he nodded at her and Shannon took that as he cue to leave.

"Later." Shannon replied as she walked away.

"I suggest finding some shelter." Sayid called after her. "It will rain soon." Shannon kept walking, seeing no need to respond.

* * *

Of course it would rain. Because being stranded wasn't punishment enough, no, her clothes had to be ruined as well. Shannon quickly took off her shoes, as the rain began to pour down. Feeling her toes squish into the wet sand, Shannon walked over to Boone who had run off to find her.

"Abandoning your charge?" Shannon said viciously as Boone joined her. "That's not very ethical."

"I assume you wanted help." Boone bit back. "But if you want to be by yourself that's just fine." He huffed, walking a few paces ahead of her.

"Boone, wait." Shannon sighed, catching up to him. She shivered as the rain grew heavier, and frowned when she saw Sayid. She hated weathermen, she dated two of them. "Look, what's your plan?"

"Fuselage."

"Gross." Shannon said disgusted. "I'd rather the rain."

"Go ahead. Get pneumonia, cough up a lung. I really don't care." Boone shrugged as he kept walking forward.

Disgruntled, Shannon rolled her eyes and continued with her brother. To take her mind off her newly pedicure feet soaking into the wet sand, Shannon watched the other survivors scramble for shelter. No one else seemed heading for the inside of the fuselage. In fact, one man didn't even seem to be trying to get out of the rain at all. A bald man sat on the beach, his eyes closed and head tilted toward the heavens.

The big guy, Hurley, called after her and Boone when he saw where they were headed. "I'm telling you, you don't want to go in there. Too many bodies."

Personally, Shannon wanted to listen to him but the last thing she wanted was too look weak in front of Boone. So she simply tossed her hair, and kept on with the march.

Reaching the fuselage, Shannon was stopped by the faint smell of decay. Although CSI had taught her that it would be a long time before the bodies were in a full rate of decay, the smell still sickened her.

"I'll go first." Boone said charitably, "wait out here."

"Not really an issue." Shannon wrinkled her nose. As Boone disappeared inside, the same sound from earlier reappeared, Shannon shivered in earnest as she watched the trees once again fall and move.

The pregnant girl moved into the rain again and turned to a middle-aged black woman. Shannon idly wondered if it was healthy for her to be standing out in the rain.

"Shannon!" Boone called. "What the hell are you waiting for? A red carpet?"

Shannon cast one last look at the pregnant girl before heading into the fuselage. She wondered if it would be too idiotic to hope that whatever was in the jungle was a really large and loud rescue crew.


	2. Lovelier Lands

Symptom Recital

Summary: A look at the woman, everybody loves to hate

Disclaimer: Lost and its characters belong to J.J Abrams and ABC

Author's Note: Inspired by Dorothy Parker's poem Symptom Recital, some scenes are slightly reworked to fit with this fiction.

* * *

I hate my legs, I hate my hands,

I do not yearn for lovelier lands.

- Symptom Recital-

* * *

If she closed her eyes and allowed her body to relax onto the grainy sand, she could almost believe that she was sunning on a beach in Hawaii rather than Gillian's friggin' Island. After the torrential downpour Shannon had ventured deeper into the fuselage when her brother had left to play medic, in the bowels of the wreckage Shannon found her bags thrown from the overhead compartment. With the exception of a few cheap items and clothes shoved into a suitcase, Shannon never put her luggage where she couldn't see it. The last thing she wanted was someone pawing through her belongings. Besides, most of the time she packed only the essentials, and bought the rest. If she ever had too much for carry on, she'd simply find the dumbest looking male and sweet talk him into letting her carry-on extra luggage. A bat of the eyes, a soft voice, it never failed her.

With a sigh Shannon flipped off of her stomach, surprised to find the heavily pregnant girl sitting beside her. Shannon tensed immediately, she hated being surprised. But the girl immediately smiled apologetically, "sorry. I thought you were asleep. I didn't mean to wake you."

Shannon shrugged with an air indifference. "Whatever."

" I'm Claire, by the way." The girl said simply as she turned back to writing in a worn journal. " The beach is so crowded, I just wanted to get away. This seemed like the best spot…" Claire trailed off, biting her lip self-consciously. "… I can leave." Claire shifted and closed her book, ready to move.

" No, it's fine." Shannon said quickly, " I'm Shannon." Claire smiled happily as she made herself comfortable in the sand.

" American?" Claire asked after a moment or two. Claire looked at her, pen poised on paper. For a wild moment Shannon thought she was being interviewed.

" You could say that." Shannon frowned, the one thing she didn't want to talk about was her life. Her life invariably led to Boone, and thoughts of Boone would not do. " I haven't been there in a while."

" I've always lived in Australia." Claire said with a chipper note in her voice, Shannon wondered if the girl ever experienced any sadness. Shannon's stomach dropped as she turned to Claire, Shannon wondered if Claire had anyone of the plane, she doubted it. Judging by the lack of wedding band, or clinging boyfriend, Shannon guessed that the girl was travelling alone. Not that Shannon was one to judge a person's choices, hell, Claire probably had it right idea.

"I was there for awhile, France before that." Shannon offered simply, "Australia was nice. Good shops."

Claire nodded and turned back to her journal, Shannon watched as Claire wrote a few things down.

"Hey." Shannon looked up and saw Boone making his way over to the two. He bent down and looked at Shannon seriously, ignoring Claire. "We're going through some clothes, sorting them." Boone pointed to her bikini, he seemed exasperated by the fact that she found her things and his were still missing. "I see you found your bag. Come on, you wanna give us a hand?"

Shannon didn't understand why everyone was so eager to go through the fuselage and pick through things like they were all Robinson Crusoe. Didn't any of them realize that when the plane's came, that the families of the dead would probably be pissed that they went through their belongings. "Not really." Shannon said obviously, "you're wasting your time. They're coming."

Boone sighed at her reaction, and walked away almost immediately. "They're coming." Shannon repeated under her breath as she watched the survivors sort through the clothes of strangers.

"Is that your boyfriend?" Claire asked watching Shannon.

Shannon froze almost immediately, in normal families the question would be easy enough to answer, in her life that question held unimaginable repercussions. Her mouth ran dry, and she paused a long time before answering the blonde. "My brother, Boone, God's friggin' gift to humanity."

Shannon looked away, afraid that Claire could sense something that Shannon didn't want anyone to know. Dimly she wondered why she still called Boone her brother. After all, when her father died and Sabrina re-married again, didn't that make whatever legal document that deemed her and Boone brother and sister void?

Claire smiled at Shannon knowingly, almost sensing the need to change the conversation. "I used to have a stomach." Claire smiled ruefully and rubbed her stomach.

Shannon glanced at Claire's small frame that was completely overshadowed by that bulging stomach. "You know what it is?" She asked, for lack of anything else to say.

Claire's hands settled on the top of her stomach and looked down at the bump sadly. "Not yet." She whispered, staring at the mound, she turned to Shannon and smiled sadly. "I haven't felt the baby move since yesterday."

Shannon had no idea how to respond, and silence she knew would be far too rude. Even for her. She knew that she should say something comforting, a kind white lie. But Shannon usually avoided lies; they could be too confusing when called upon.

She had never hung around women much, all her life she preferred the company of men. The male linear mind was much easier to understand and manipulate. When it came to men, Shannon always knew where she stood. But she couldn't trust women; a much older psychology professor who wanted her for more than a case study had said something about a displacement of trust issues. Couldn't trust others because she couldn't trust herself. Of course, Shannon chalked it up as talk to get into her pants, because almost after the unwanted psychoanalysis that's exactly what the man tried to do.

"Oh." Shannon offered she smiled at Claire, hoping that it would be enough. She breathed a sigh of relief as Claire smiled back.

"Thanks." Claire replied sincerely, seeming to understand what she had been trying to say all along.

"Well." Shannon shrugged, seeing nothing else to say to the woman. "Call me when it does." She said before flipping onto her stomach.

* * *

Shannon fell asleep almost immediately after the short conversation with Claire. By the time she woke up the sun's rays were hotter than before, and Claire was gone. Lazily she tilted her head up and watched the others on the beach.

A group of men were on the center of the beach, and Shannon could almost feel the testosterone levels rising as the men become louder and louder. Watching as a tall blonde man pointed an accusing finger at that Sayid guy, Shannon idly wondered how long it would be until the scene turned into a school yard fight.

Sayid seemed ready to walk away, and for a moment it seemed that everything had been resolved. But the blonde man shouted something at Sayid, which caused the man to lose it. Before Shannon could even make out what the blonde had yelled, Sayid launched himself at the blond and punched him squarely on the face.

Shannon sniggered as she watched Michael try to intervene and settle the dispute. Michael waved his arms comically, trying to stop the fight – like that would work. Shannon assumed that whatever was going onto between the two men was bound to happen sooner or later, might as well duke it out now than on the rescue plane.

Shannon supposed that if she were closer to the brawl the atmosphere would be quite serious, but from her distance everything looked like an action sequence from a silent film. The scuffle was quite humorous, and it looked like Sayid would win until the blonde man picked up a handful of sand and threw in it Sayid's face.

Before the fight could go much further however, it was halted by the newly arrived Charlie, Jack and Kate.

"Hey!" Shannon heard Jack yell, as the man walked over to the group. "Break it up! Break it up!" Michael aided Jack as they struggled to split apart the two men. After a few moments Jack succeeded in pulling the blonde off Sayid, but Michael had a more difficult time stopping Sayid from retaliating.

Bored from watching the scene sans audio, Shannon got up and walked over the group. Making sure to stand far enough away the she couldn't be involved if the fists started flying again. Getting closer to the area, the sounded became clearer over the roar of the waves.

She saw Boone nearer to the group than she, and he seemed eager to throw his weight into the conversation. She saw Boone look around and glare when his eyes settled on her. She could almost hear the dialogue running through Boone's head, questioning her right to join into the group when she hadn't moved a finger to help any of them. Whatever.

"… Can anybody help?" Shannon heard Kate ask the group. The brunette seemed to command everyone's attention, if Jack was the Alpha male of the group it seemed that Kate was the Alpha female. Not that Shannon cared, after all, Kate may want to be a head honcho on this forsaken piece of dirt, but in the real world, Shannon knew who would pull the strings.

"Yes. I might be able to." Sayid offered, still looking breathless and angry from the fight.

"Oh great!" The blonde yelled disbelievingly, looking around the group in protest. "Perfect! Let's trust this guy!"

"That's Sawyer." A soft voice whispered beside Shannon. Shannon looked over and smiled at Claire. She was surprised how quietly a woman that heavy could move. "I caught him going through bags." Claire continued frowning slightly, her eyes shifting to watch as the fat guy tried to intervene. "He said that they were his, but I doubt that he wears lingerie." Claire shrugged tearing her gaze away, as Sawyer insulted the fat guy. "I don't think he's a bad guy, just really defensive."

"He's been stealing stuff?" Shannon said incredulously, casting a look back at her bags. Needing assurance that they were still there.

"That's Hurley." Claire pointed at the fat guy, ignoring Shannon's question. "He helped me after the crash and gave me extra food, seems nice."

"He offered me some too. I never asked his name." Shannon shrugged uninterested, looking at Claire.

"Why are you telling me all this?" Shannon questioned, feeling slightly put off that she knew so little about her surroundings.

"You seem kind of isolated." Claire whispered vaguely, her attention caught as Jack stepped into the fight once more.

"I'm not isolated." Shannon protested her mind flitted back to that psychology professor and his damn defence mechanism/displacement theory bull. Shannon felt her resentment rise at Claire's statement; the girl barely knew her and was suddenly passing judgement? "I just don't care."

"Sure."

"Yeah." Shannon's narrowed her eyes, turning at the blonde. Sudden Claire didn't seem quite as naïve and friendly as she once did. "I don't need _anyone_." Shannon warned as Claire shrugged and turned back to the group.

No longer interested in the fight, especially since the conversation had somehow turned to something about transceiver's, Shannon decided to leave.

Shannon looked back and Claire and glared, who Claire to pass judgement on her? Looking back at her carefully laid out belongings, which were far away from the others, Shannon suddenly did not want to return to her spot.

Contrary to popular belief, Shannon wasn't stupid. She was sly. She knew the moments when she was supposed to act stupid, smile, or speak her mind. She knew what smile to use, which way to wear her hair, and what clothes suited her best. Those were the things that living with Sabrina Carlyle taught her. Shannon knew many things, but she didn't understand them.

For years Shannon didn't understand why her step-brother cared so much about her well being, or why her step-mother hated her so. She didn't understand how Boone could almost smother her one moment but then ignore her the next. When she had finally figured out the violent emotions Boone held for her she hadn't been too surprised. Originally she had tried to ignore those emotions, move on and move out. But he was always there stifling her, he would never leave her.

After her father's death, Sabrina became the sole benefactor of the Rutherford fortune. If it had not been for a small proviso in the will to set aside money for Shannon, she knew that Sabrina would not have hesitated to throw her out to the wolves.

That her father could forget his own daughter so quickly, was one of the main things she did not understand.

Scattered on the beach were bodies that had survived the crash but had died afterwards. Living only to feel the grains of sand beneath them before death took them away. For reasons unknown to her Shannon walked along that section of the beach, passing various people as she went. Hurley tried to speak to her on his way to Sayid, but she brushed him off – just as she knew she would.

In the back of her mind, Shannon knew that something was wrong. That the rescue opp should have arrived hours ago, should have attempted to contact them already. Someone should have come. Ready to return to her original spot on the beach, away from whatever she failed to find, Shannon sighed and turned around. Only to discover that she almost stumbled on a dead body.

How she had missed the body in the first place she didn't know, but there it was, staring back at her, open eyed. Bile rose in her throat as curiosity got the better of her; she shadowed the sun from her eyes as got a closer look at the man.

* * *

"What are you doing?"

Shannon looked up, startled to see Boone sitting beside her. He looked at her with open distaste and a strange curiosity.

Shannon closed her eyes, and sniffed quietly. Calming down she looked once more at the body before turning to Boone. "I was mean to him."

Boone looked at her as if he couldn't believe what he heard. "What?"

Shannon looked at Boone, slightly upset that he couldn't remember the man. That after everything, Boone still didn't understand her. "He's that guy from the gate…" Shannon said slowly, she clenched her jaw remembering everything she had said to him. She hadn't realized how close they had come, how lucky they were. How impossible it all was. She hoped that her words were not the last said the man. "He wouldn't let us have our seats in first class. He saved our lives."

Boone sighed for a moment, before speaking again. "Come on, Shan, we're trying to clear some of the wreckage; you should help out. You're just being worthless over here."

Shannon stared at Boone in disbelief, she couldn't comprehend that he didn't get that she needed help now. She didn't understand how it was that he could be so in love with her, and yet not understand her at all. "I'm being what?"

Boone turned to her, his face turning red and defensive. "What do you want me to say! You're sitting on your ass, staring at bodies."

"I've just been through a trauma here, okay?" Shannon retorted, silently pleading that Boone would understand, that he would shut up and leave her be.

"We've all been through a trauma." Boone retorted, "the only difference is, since the crash you've actually given yourself a pedicure!"

Shannon turned to him, tears in her eyes for a completely different reason. "You know what! It is so easy to make fun of me. You're good at it, I get it!" Shannon yelled back, as Boone was already talking over her. They both knew that this wasn't about the crash, or the body, but about a night that was best left forgotten.

"Yeah, well I wish I didn't have to waste my time making fun of you. I wish I never had a reason and, yeah, it is easy, Shannon."

Shannon hated that smug tone in his voice, every day it would creep into his voice while he lorded something else over her. She got the memo a long time ago, she knew that in the long run despite whatever love her father held for her, Boone would also be the favoured child. Boone would always come out on top. "Screw you! You do not have the slightest idea of what I am thinking." Shannon found it difficult to speak; the rage and tears were making everything much harder than it had to be.

Boone continued talking over her, "I have a much better idea than you think I do."

That damn smug tone. "No, you don't!" She shouted, she knew Boone inside and out, she knew exactly what buttons to push, that was the benefit of being the black sheep of that happy family crap. Boone knew nothing about her, he never did.

"Okay, Shannon!" Boone said standing; he waved his arms and shrugged. Only pretending to be interested in her thoughts. "Then what are you thinking?"

Shannon paused, she hadn't meant for the conversation to get this far. She searched the beach for a moment, catching sight of Kate and Sayid. Shannon vaguely remembered Hurley mentioning a hike before warning her about walking along the beach. "I'm going with them." Shannon motioned over to the other two preparing for the trek. "On the hike," she added unnecessarily.

"Oh yeah?" Boone scoffed, almost laughing in disbelief.

Shannon stood up resolutely; she looked Boone right in the eye. "Yep. I'm going." She smiled, almost daring him to stop her.

"No you're not, Shannon." Boone grabbed her arms, trying to avert her as she walked away. Shannon shoved him away, slapping his hands. She quickened her pace as she heard Boone yelled her name in anger. Shannon broke into a run catching up to Kate and Sayid who were getting ready to leave.

"I'd like to come with you." Shannon said breathlessly, her heart pounding from either the short run or the fight with Boone.

Boone arrived before Sayid or Kate could even say a word, Boone immediately stated his disapproval. Talking to Kate and Sayid as if she wasn't there, as if she was a child to be reckoned with. "She's not going. She doesn't know-"

"The hell I'm not!" Shannon protested immediately. Boone still ignored her, facing Kate and Sayid.

"It's what she does. She always-"

Shannon stared at Boone in disbelief, how dare he try to explain her actions to a pair of strangers. "-You don't know what the hell I-" She raised her voice trying to speak over her brother.

" -really bad decisions which upsets the family which at the moment is me!" Boone continued in his damn infuriating tone.

Shannon caught Boone's attention, gritted her teeth and spoke to him as evenly as possible. "Shut up and stop trying to be charming." She turned to the two stunned on-lookers and smiled as if nothing was out of the ordinary. "I'm coming with you."

The woman, Kate, shifted impatiently. "I don't know if that's such a good idea-" She muttered, looking at Sayid for support. But the man remained silent.

"What are you, two years older than me? Please." Shannon scoffed, as if Kate could even try to keep her here. Shannon caught sight of Charlie, finally a person she knew would support her. "You're going aren't you?" If Kate and Jack had allowed Charlie to come with them on the first trip, and on the second trip then they had to allow other people to join in. It would be, like, a conspiracy if they didn't.

" Yeah, are you?" Charlie answered quickly, fidgeting with something in his pocket. He rocked on the balls of his feet waiting for her answer, which didn't take long.

" Yep." Shannon smiled at the Brit, knowing that Boone would be pissed as hell.

"Yep, I'm definitely going." Charlie assured, not even bothering to ask Kate or Sayid.

Kate sighed dramatically, catching their attention. "Look, everybody can come." She gestured to the camp, "but we're leaving now."

Shannon shrugged and immediately began to walk off, following an already disappearing Sayid. She smiled as she overheard Charlie say "You couldn't tell from that, but she's actually really nice." Shannon wondered he was talking about her or Kate.

* * *

The last time Shannon had been on a hike was in high school, when she was trying to impress some Neanderthal jock that she now couldn't even remember the name of. After spending years on beaches and cities, Shannon had forgotten just how much she hated the wilderness. Swatting the bugs that flew by her face, she huffed impatiently. At first she hadn't minded the walk, it was leisurely and she sure as hell enjoyed Boone's anger. But then Sayid had mentioned going to higher ground, and things simply got worse for her. It wasn't that she was unfit, but she simply hated any sort of exercise, preferring other means of losing weight. Luckily Charlie was in worse shape beside her. He looked pale and sweaty, but he was funny and provided jokes that kept her going.

Kate seemed to be made for long hauls, she hardly seemed affected by the uphill trek. Neither did Sayid. Boone seemed to do pretty well also, but then again he had a free pass to some of the best country clubs in the L.A.

Sawyer, the southern, had joined them only a few minutes into the hike. He had quickly moved to the front of the group and since then had been trying, and failing, to impress Kate.

Shannon knew Sawyer's type very well, which is possibly why she didn't trust him one bit. She knew a con when she saw one. Complex guy, her ass.

An hour of walking, melded into two, which melded into three. After a while, Shannon stopped looking at her watch, it only depressed her. They had reached the mountain range that Sayid wanted to scout; Shannon had to admit that she found the steepness of the large mound quite difficult. Luckily, both Boone and Sayid helped her with the climb.

Finally when they had passed that special area of hell, Shannon was thankful to be walking on flat ground. Even though the grass was long, and the bugs were especially vicious. She swore she saw a mosquito as big as her fist.

"Okay." Sawyer stopped the trek, gesturing around him. "Wide open space. You should check the radio, see if we're good."

Sayid looked at Sawyer calmly, hardly reacting to the obvious impatience in Sawyer's voice. Shannon had to give Sayid his props, if she had someone digging at her every few minutes she would have lost her temper long ago. Boone at least was a periodic pain in the ass, Sawyer was continuous.

"We're not going to have any reception here." Sayid said simply, staring Sawyer down.

Sawyer groaned, "Just try it!" He said evenly, expecting Sayid to back down.

"I don't want to waste the batteries." Sayid protested again.

"I'm not asking you to keep it on all day." Sawyer's voice began to rise, he seriously seemed to be pissed off.

Shannon grinned as Sayid made another excuse, this definitely seemed to be some sort of superiority conflict.

"Just check the damn radio!" Sawyer seemed to be losing his patience with each passing second. Even Shannon had to admit, that Sawyer did have a bit a point. But then again, she didn't know anything about technology.

"If I just check, we might not have any juice left-" Sayid's explanation was cut short by a loud roar in the jungle. Shannon froze, immediately thinking of the sounds from last night and the trees that were bowed down by whatever made that noise.

They all stood still for a moment, each of them looking in a different direction to spot whatever made that roar.

"My god." Shannon whimpered, the strained silence finally getting to her.

"What the hell is that?" Boone whispered, not expecting an answer.

Kate licked her lips, still facing the jungle. Her eyes darting around the foliage. "Something's coming."

The roar shifted to a strange sound of grunting and growling that reminded Shannon of childhood trips to the zoo. The grass began to shake and bend and if more than the wind was pushing it.

"It's coming towards us, I think." Charlie said, his voice sounding quiet next to the loud rustle of the tall grass.

"Come on, let's move." Kate said suddenly, her voice strong.

Shannon stood transfixed on the moving grass. "I shouldn't have come on this tr-" She whispered, hating Boone for pissing her off.

Just as Kate turned to walk away, Shannon saw a flash of white fur close to their group. Immediately she screamed, everyone broke out into a panic and ran from their spots.

Shannon saw Sawyer fall behind, but she wasn't about to protest his stupidity. Kate stopped her run, "Charlie!" She suddenly called out.

Shannon looked behind, and sure enough, Charlie had disappeared.

"Kate, no!" Sayid protested as Kate ran back to their position to search for Charlie. Almost immediately the three of them followed her.

Suddenly multiple shots rang out through the air, Shannon shoved her arms over her head immediately, ready to start screaming. Everybody stopped their movements and turned back towards the source of the sound.

Sawyer stood calmly as anything, his handsome face looking both shocked and angry. A steel gun hanging loosely off his hand.

On the ground near him was a large furry white bear.

"That's… That's a big bear." Shannon stammered, unable to believe what she was seeing, the fear she held quickly dissipating.

"Think that's what killed the pilot?" Boone suddenly asked, Shannon looked at him quizzically wondering about what he meant.

Kate and Charlie looked at each other, surprised by Boone's question. Charlie shrugged and looked at Boone, his tone surprisingly calm and light. "No. No that's a tiny, teeny version compared to that." Charlie gestured what he meant with his fingertips.

"Guys, this isn't just a bear." Kate finally spoke, addressing the fact that no one else wanted to point out. "It's a polar bear."

Boone walked over to the bear, inspecting if as if he were 'friggin Hercule Poirot. He leaned in and touched the fur before jumping away. "That can't be a polar bear." He said looking rather bewildered.

"It's a polar bear." Kate and Sayid agreed, as Boone walked back over.

"Wait a minute." Shannon bit her lip, unable to believe what they were saying. "Polar bears don't usually live in the jungle."

Charlie looked at her and smiled, "spot on."

Shannon smiled at his support as Boone merely rolled his eyes. Shannon huffed, as if what he said was so original.

"No, polar bears don't live near this far south." Sayid reasoned, Shannon wondered if anything shocked that man.

Boone pointed back to the bear, "this one does."

"Did. It did." Sawyer drawled, a slight hint of pride in his voice. The gun glinted in the afternoon sun, catching everyone's attention once more.

Kate turned to Sawyer, looking rather offended. "Where did that come from?"

Sawyer's eyebrows raised a notch, as if he couldn't believe Kate's question. "Probably Bear Village," he yelled gesturing at the dead animal. "How the hell do I know?"

Kate sighed, and rolled her eyes perfectly. "Not the bear, the gun." She said slowly, her eyes locked onto the metal object.

Sawyer shrugged casually, "I got it off one of the bodies."

"One of the bodies?" Sayid repeated disbelieving.

Sawyer's jaw tightened as he turned to the man, "Yeah." Sawyer's voice grew dangerously low. "One of the bodies."

Coldness spread in the pit of Shannon's stomach, as she understood Sayid's disbelief. Shannon looked at Sawyer, suddenly quite aware of another reason she should not trust him. "People don't carry guns on the planes."

Sawyer turned to her and grinned sarcastically. "They do if they're U.S Marshals, sweet cheeks." His voice had a humorous tone to it. "There was one on the plane."

Kate's face whitened, she looked rather ill as she whispered. "How do you know that?"

Sawyer shook his head at the inquisition, his blonde locks reflecting the sun. "I saw a guy lying there with an ankle holster, so I took the gun. Thought it might come in handy." His perfected sarcastic tone grew more apparent with each word. "Guess what! I just shot a bear!"

"So why do think he's a Marshal?" Kate questioned again, still looking pale.

Sawyer flipped a square object out of his pocket, he held it up for them to see. "'Cause of the clip-on badge." He said, still affronted. "I took that too, thought it was cool."

Sayid's eyes narrowed distrustfully, "I know who you are." He said slowly. "You're the prisoner.

Sawyer raised his eyebrows, all humour gone. "I'm the what?" Sawyer questioned, his voice low, almost a growl.

"You found the gun on him, the U.S. Marshal." Sayid reasoned calmly. Shannon almost rolled her eyes at Sayid's logic, it looked like Sayid thought he was Hercule Poirot as well… Not that she even read Agatha Christie or anything…

"Yes, I believe you did." Sayid continued, pacing back and forth. "You knew where it was because you were the one he was bringing back to the States." Sayid accused, seeming quite satisfied with his conclusion. "Those handcuffs were on you, that's how you knew there was a gun."

Sawyer glared at the man, "that's all-"

At Sawyer's denial, whatever rage Sayid had been holding back was breached. "That's who you are, you son of a bitch!"

Sawyer seemed more amused by Sayid outburst than threatened. "You're as suspicious of me as I am of you." Sawyer seemed almost proud that he was distrusted.

"You are the prisoner." Sayid retorted, his dark eyes narrowed.

"Fine!" Sawyer yelled, pointing to himself. "I'm the criminal. You're the terrorist." He threw his arms in the air and turned to Shannon, her back straightening immediately. "We can all play a part. Who do you wanna be?" He questioned, staring directly at her.

Shannon looked away, as Kate, with surprising agility, snatched the gun out of Sawyer's grasp. Sawyer's gaze locked onto the brunette, a smirk forming as Kate pointed the gun at him.

Shannon licked her lips, suddenly quite nervous about Kate's actions. She wished she had paid more attention on the beach so that she would know exactly what kind of freaks she was stuck with.

After a tense moment, Kate finally asked if any of them knew how to use a gun. Her gaze and gun never wavering from Sawyer's face.

**"**I think you just pull the trigger." Charlie mimicked, bending his index finger. Shannon glanced at Charlie nervously, completely unnerved that he could be so calm.

"Don't use the gun." Sayid warned, an action which surprised Shannon. Sayid took a few tentative steps towards Kate before she answered.

"I want to take it apart." Kate explained, looking rather haggard that no one seemed to believe her.

"Oh." Charlie shrugged, sounding almost let down.

"There's a button on the grip." Sayid suddenly pointed out. He watched Kate's every move. "Push that, it will eject the magazine."

_Grip? Magazine?_ Shannon questioned silently, she looked at Charlie who also seemed confused by Sayid's words. But, for a girl who knew nothing about guns, Kate was very accurate in her job. Kate pushed something, and what Shannon guessed was the magazine dropped to the ground. The metal piece conspicuous on the green of the grass.

"There's still a round in the chamber. Hold the grip, pull the top of the gun." Sayid added, now watching both Kate and Sawyer.

The bullet dropped out of the chamber, falling slowly to the ground. Shannon observed Sawyer as he watched Kate, looking quite amused at her antics. Now that the gun was taken apart, she handed a piece of the gun to Sayid and the rest to Sawyer.

As she handed the empty gun back to Sawyer, the southerner grasped her wrist rather than the gun and pulled her towards him.

Shannon breathed in sharply, unaware of if she should do something. She looked at Charlie who shrugged and whispered, "she can handle him."

"I know your type." Sawyer smirked, eyeing Kate knowingly. Shannon knew that look well, that arrogant condescending looking.

"I'm not so sure." Kate replied evenly, not at all set off guard by Sawyer's actions. In fact she looked as if she had been expecting it.

"Yeah, I've been with girls like you."

Kate narrowed her eyes, and smiled dangerously. "No girl's exactly like me." She seemed to hint as she pulled away from Sawyer. Who simply chuckled at her reaction and pocketed the gun.

Kate walked off, and after an uneasy moment, everyone followed.

* * *

Shannon was pleased when the finally left the long grass, the grass seemed to purposely harass her. Always scratching her legs, or hitting her face. Whatever humour the group originally had about the hike, was lost after the polar bear attack.

A bit more uphill than before, Shannon found it more difficult to breathe, the air seemed especially warm and thin. When Charlie stopped for another break and offered everyone a drink of water, Shannon bent over and while pretending to re-tie her shoes she took a puff of her inhaler.

Boone scoffed beside her, as she straightened up. "Guess, only unpopular people need to breathe." He remarked coolly, watching as she tucked the inhaler back into her purse.

"Not a word." Shannon warned as the group began walking again, "not a word."

After a bit more walking, Sayid began to slow down and survey the area. He seemed to be looking for an area to test the transceiver. Taking the transceiver out of his backpack, Sayid held the transceiver carefully.

Catching site of Sayid's actions, Sawyer rolled his eyes and remarked, "Oh, now's a good time to check the radio. Not before, but now." Sawyer reasoned sarcastically, tapping his foot impatiently.

Sayid ignored the Southern's tone, "We're up higher." He explained casually.

"Yes, we are." Sawyer drawled sarcastically, watching the black transceiver.

Carefully pressing a few buttons, a low static noise filled the air. Sounding strange next to the sounds of wildlife that Shannon had gotten used to.

After a quiet moment, Sayid looked up, suddenly excited. "Bar. Hey! We got a bar!"

Shannon and the others moved closer to Sayid. All of them desperate for the damn thing to work.

Sawyer merely groaned at their reaction, not believing that the transceiver would work. Shannon wondered why he even came.

"Mayday, Mayday!" Sayid spoke, holding the transceiver up to his mouth. He waited a second for a response, but all the transceiver emitted was a strange feedback.

"What is that?" Kate breathed, leaning in closer to the transceiver.

"Feedback." Sayid sighed, looking rather dejected.

"Feedback from what? What would do that?"

"I don't know!" Sayid shrugged, looking down at the transceiver, as if only looking at the thing would solve the problem.

"I'll tell you what would do that." Sawyer sounded oddly pleased, he pointed at Sayid. "This guy not fixing the radio. The thing doesn't even work."

Sayid glared at Sawyer before replying. "No. It's not broken." He said slowly, looking at the area around him. "We can't transmit because something else is already transmitting."

The group quietened, Kate immediately looked around the area. Shannon wondered about Sayid's tone, wasn't another transmission a good thing. Didn't that mean that someone was coming for them.

"Transmitting from where?" Charlie asked, his normal jovial tone now serious.

Shannon turned to Charlie, who seemed to understand something she didn't. In fact, they all seemed to understand something she didn't. "What?" She pressed, a panicky feeling coming over her.

"Somewhere close, the signal's strong." Sayid answered, his eyes still transfixed on the feedback.

"Somewhere close?" Charlie repeated, he smiled coming to the same conclusion Shannon did. "You mean _on_ the island? That's great!"

Sayid frowned at Charlie's conclusion, and immediately Shannon understood what was wrong, if something was already playing than it was blocking their transmission. Damn it. Shannon sincerely hoped that Charlie was right.

"Maybe it's other survivors." Boone offered, looking almost hopeful himself.

"From our plane?" Shannon rolled her eyes, "how would they even-"

"What kind of transmission is it?" Sawyer broke in, cutting Shannon off. He looked rather intrigued at the notion of rescue.

"It could be a satellite phone." Sayid muttered, focusing on the transceiver. "Maybe a radio phone?"

"Can we listen to it?" Kate asked hurriedly, Shannon swore that Kate looked almost worried over what they might hear.

"Let me get the frequency first." Sayid breathed, turning a few dials. "Hold on."

Sawyer laughed at the tension of the group, "there's no transmission."

"Shut up." Kate warned, looking at Sawyer.

"The rescue party." Charlie grinned, he turned to Shannon, "it has to be."

Shannon sucked in her breath as a woman's voice came through the transceiver. With the exception of a bit of static, the voice was quite clear. Shannon's stomach dropped when she heard what was transmitting, immediately she realized that the transmission was not from a rescue operation. After all, the rescue party would have been either American or Australian, it seemed impossible that the nationality be French.

"That's French!" Charlie yelled excitedly, almost jumping. "The French are coming! I've never been so happy to hear the French!"

Sayid laughed as well, Shannon shrugged at her previous thoughts, if Sayid and Charlie both thought it was from a rescue mission than it must be. Perhaps they had landed over international waters.

**"**I never took French." Kate smiled, even though she still sounded worried. "What is she saying?"

"Does anyone speak French?" Sayid enquired, looking around the group.

Shannon clenched her fists as thoughts of Paris came back to her. The last thing she needed was to screw up a transmission translation, not only would she be worthless, she'd also be stupid.

Before she could stop him, Boone pointed at her. "She does."

"No, I don't!" Shannon hissed, was Boone trying to set her up for failure? "What? I-"

"Shannon, what are you talking about?" Boone protested, his eyes widening at her denials. "You spent a year in Paris!"

"That was _drinking_, not studying." She retorted, hoping the subject would dropped. The last thing she need was for him to bring up St. Tropez.

The electronic voice of the transceiver continued, interrupting Shannon again, spouting off random numbers.

"Okay, what's that?" Charlie asked, pointing at the transceiver.

Sayid abruptly pleaded with the transmitter, "Oh, no. No-no-no-no-no-no-no!" He began to tap a few button and dials, obviously concerned about something.

"No-no-no, what?" Kate's voice was almost hysterical at Sayid's reaction.

"The batteries are dying!"

Kate looked at the transceiver and then at Sayid, "how much time do we have?"

Sayid looked up at Shannon, "not much." Shannon shook her head, there was no way he could guilt trip her into translating. No friggin' way.

Boone turned to her, looking panicked and worried. "I've heard you speak French." He pleaded, "just listen to this. Listen to it!"

Shannon looked at Boone, biting her lower lip to keep from crying, the pressure of the group finally getting to her nerves. "I can't!"

Sawyer grabbed her arms, almost shaking her. "Do you speak French or not?" He yelled, letting her go. "Because that would be nice."

_Ils sont morte_. The French words filled the tense air, immediately snatches of memories from Paris drifted into her head. _They are dead_, Shannon translated immediately.

Rather than more French, the voice on the transceiver switched back to the numbers it had spouted off before.

Charlie shook his head, "That voice is weird." He stated, looking to Sayid. "What is that?"

Sayid and Boone turned to her at once, speaking in unison. "Come on!" They urged her, Shannon closed her eyes and tried to block out everything but the French.

After hearing a few more familiar phrases of French, Shannon opened her eyes. "It's… It's repeating." She said tentatively, looking around her for support.

Sayid smiled at her encouragingly, "she's right. It's a loop." He explained, once more becoming Hercule Poirot. Shannon wondered if Sayid knew anything about the detective. "The duration - it's repeating the same message. It's a counter."

_Ils sont morte, _the transmission repeated. _They are dead._

Sayid was quiet and seemed to concentrate on the transmission. "The next number will end five-three-three…" He said quietly, holding up the transceiver as the numbers he predicted rang out.

"Does anyone know what the hell he's talking about?" Sawyer asked, amused by the intense look of concentration on the Iraqi's face.

Sayid turned to Sawyer, Shannon was thankful that he was so patient. Her nerves were on the edge, ready to break and Sayid had much more pressure on him. "It's a running count of the number of times the message has repeated." He explained calmly, looking at Sawyer. "It's forty-thirty seconds long so…" Sayid frowned as he tried to calculate in his head. "How long…"

"Don't forget to carry the one, sheik." Sawyer drawled, adamant that Sayid was wrong.

Shannon ignored Sawyer's ribbing as she focused on a new set of lines that came out through the transceiver. Shannon breathed deeply, preparing herself. "She's saying, 'Please.'…" Shannon focused on the ground, trying to ignore Sawyer's groans. "She's saying, 'Please help me. Please come get me.'"

"Or she's not!" Sawyer protested, as Shannon began to panic. "You don't even speak French!" He reminded them, looking at her in disbelief.

"Let her listen!" Kate pleaded, hitting Sawyer in the side.

"Shut up, man!" Boone yelled as Shannon's breathing began to quicken.

Charlie began to fidget again, unable to keep still. Charlie rocked back and forth, sounded panicked. "How's the battery? The battery!"

Sayid passed Shannon the transceiver, she closed her eyes and tried to ignore them all as she place the transceiver against her ear. As she heard the voice, and rapidly began to translate, Shannon began to shake. She never was able to deal under pressure.

" 'I'm alone now. I'm…" Shannon stuttered, trying to keep her voice from breaking. "On the island alone. Please, someone come." Tears spilled out of her eyes, as what she had feared became true. There was no rescue mission coming for them. "The others, they… They're dead. It killed them. It killed them all.'" She finished whispering, taking the transceiver away from her ear. She held it in her hand and once again felt oddly displaced.

"That was good." Boone said bracingly, patting her back and looking impressed.

"Sixteen years." Sayid suddenly spoke, Shannon turned to him still sniffling.

"What?" Sawyer questioned, his voice seemed to have lost that sarcastic edge in the face of Shannon's translation.

"Sixteen years. And five months, that's the count." Sayid elaborated, looking quietly into the distance. Shannon expected Sawyer to say something rude, but the southerner simply stood quietly with a far away look on his face.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Boone asked, looking at Sayid.

"The iterations..." Sayid explained, pointing to the transceiver still in Shannon's hand. "It's a distress call. A plea for help, a mayday." He sighed, glancing at Boone patiently. "If the count is right … It's been playing over and over for sixteen years."

"Someone else was stranded here?" Boone guessed, asking the obvious question that preyed on their minds.

Kate bit her lip, and looked at Sayid hopefully. "Maybe they came for them."

"If someone came…" Sawyer retorted, looking away, "why does it still play?"

Shannon looked around her, watching the trees branches bend and wave in the warm afternoon wind. Despite the warmth, Shannon shivered as she realized just how lost they really were.

"Guys." Charlie cut in, looking around the jungle as well. "Where are we?"

No one seemed able to answer Charlie's question, in fact no one seemed able to say anything. Kate cleared her throat self-consciously, "we should get back to camp." She reasoned, "it's not safe out here."

"It'd be safer if we had a gun." Sawyer muttered under his breath, he turned to Shannon as the other's got a bit ahead. "Nice work sweet cheeks." He drawled before quickening his pace to catch up to Kate.

Shannon slowed down her pace so she was at the back of the line, she cast one last look around the field before she felt ready to leave. After this, Shannon deemed, there was no way Boone could call her worthless.

_- Finis-_


End file.
